the raindrops....

today was the very first day at work that almost everyone in the office noes that i was very angry and arguing with someone....well...that was not the only first day i wanted to say today... see the raindrops and the ripples....today was the first day i walked back home with no tears... no crying... no sobbing... but today...what i felt was worse...my heart felt very painful...it hurts more than any other day... i can just feel the distance i have with him rite now... the distance that i fear...the distance that can keep two persons away even if u are looking straight into his eyes...it felt so far away...

i realised...maybe the letter was really the last thing that marks the end of the relationship that i once cherished...destroyed and wanted to get back...but it is gone....forever...there was no response which...i think it would be a good way of handling...maybe my sister was rite...on the 16 September...i will just be sitting at that place looking into the stars thinking of the past...and trying to face the future...alone...

tat nite...my braddie's gf...msg me..she asked...when a couple keep quarelling at the period of time..are they going to break up...i told her...me and him never quarel but we still breakup... which is rather true...but that msg brought up many memories...i also dunnoe what gave me the courage to call my tat braddie and tell him that if he really love her...give her assuarances...i told him to look at the other couple...they may always have some arguments... but they are still together...maybe...becoz....the guy can still give her assurances....which kept the relationship going...

i always like rainy days...but i never once like my heart or body or face to have a rainy day....i dunnoe when i will see the sunshine again....or rather...maybe for the first step...the rainbow... i want to smile from the bottom of my heart...i want to live the way i did last time...i just want to stop crying and to stop my heart from aching....